Thursday, December 1, 2016

Pre-PTM Rants

Assalamualaikum...


It has been a week since my last entry regarding post e-houseman rants. So, today it will be about pre-PTM rants. Yang tak tahu PTM ni apa, it stands for Program Transformasi Minda. Basically macam kursus induksi sebelum berkhidmat dalam perkhidmatan awam.




And so, for PTM and lapor diri kat hospital, there are quite a lot of stuffs need to be done. So, since last week, my schedule has been quite busy. Medical check up la, pergi akuan sumpah la, daftar kwsp, pergi request penyata akaun bank, viewing rumah sewa at pilah some more, beli beli barang keperluan yang tak cukup, buat chop, fews IG shopping benda tak cukup lagi, ambil sijil pendaftaran sementara MMC....aaa apa lagi entah. Ada je benda nak kena buat hari hari. And its tiring. Ada hari, I slept during midday sebab penat belah pagi buat itu ini and woke up around half 3 in the evening, lol, collapse habis, camne lah nanti dah masuk kerja dengan long working hoursnya. Hopefully the long working hours is bearable for me...Mmmm.


And then last minute revision lagi..... Like seriously my medical knowledge feel like.....where are theyyyyy? Haha. Sebab tu yang buat lagi cuak kot nak masuk kerja. Nak kerja pun nak kena ada knowledge jugak, right. At the moment, I'm trying my best jugak to accomodate my brain, at least with very basic stuffs like ingat balik cara nak buat procedures, physical exam, history taking, presenting case, ecg interpretation, blood analysis, x-ray, situation yang manageable expected as a HO, bla bla bla macam banyak pulak benda basicnyaaa. Ni la akibat tak mengurus masa sejak menganggur, hehs. Kang dah kelam kabut...


My emotion pulak has been much better compared to last week haha. Haha minggu lepas memang rasa cam mini-murung betul lol, blame the hormones. Now dah boleh terima hakikat, hakikat I'm going to be an hour far away from my parents and hakikat I'm now going to be a working adult soon. So, maturity and wisdom are very important to survive in a new phase of life...


And then sekarang pun dah join whatsapp group yang ada senior housemen from Pilah. So ada macam ramai jugak new housemen for this December intake. I can see ramai nerdies juga dalam group ni lol. And it is a good thing. Hopefully all of us can be a very supportive and helpful colleague to each other. Kat kursus PTM ni baru lah jumpa rakan rakan new intake ni. And so starting next week... terpaksa laa keluar dari my comfort zones, yakni to make new friends with others...


At the moment, half of me excited nak kerja (poyo ker) sebab teringat zaman jadi finalmed kat Ireland, sebab kat sana kan tak perlu pakai whitecoat, so kadang nurse mistaken us as junior doc and suruh prescribe medicine kat patients. Lol. And reaction masa tu, "Oh, i'm just a medical student,". So now, takde acah acah medical student dah. Sekarang ni, pegang tanggungjawab besar dah. And half of me, anxiety la macam biasa sebab benda baru, takut too dumb, too clueless to do a HO jobscope. Hopefully dapat adapt cepat...


And my father pulak, hari hari bagi ceramah masuk kerja... One thing yang menarik bila ayah cakap, kita kerja ni nak tolong orang. TOLONG ORANG. So, tak kisah apa apa pun kerja kita, TOLONG ORANG phrase is indeed something yang dipandang mulia dan disukai Allah s.w.t. tambah lagi kalau tambah dengan rasa ikhlas. Thus this remind me, betapa pentingnya nak kena refresh niat hari hari, why I'm going to work today....and kalau ingat balik betapa besar ganjaran melawat orang sakit, boleh ingatkan kembali betapa istimewanya pekerjaan yang amanah untuk kita ni. Gitulaaaa, semoga "long-acting" laa positivity ni, I'm just a normal human being, there are time where I will definitely feeling down later, but again as I mentioned last week, kena get up quickly! So, seriously in need of your sincere prayer. Okiesss.


My mak pulak, kalau masa drive pegi pekan, cakap, nanti dah kerja, tak dapatlah nak keluar selalu pegi pekan. Hadoi touching pulak kita dengarnya hoho. So memang dah berangan dah, offday je nak balik rumah, tido kat rumah. Nak makan food mak masak. Kerja pun tak masuk lagi, heh, HO contoh betul berangan camni.


Sentimental tu memang sentimental la. I have a very low level of sentimental threshold pulak tu, lagi laa. Kadang kadang tetiba air mata jatuh membasahi bumi mengenangkan jasa mak and ayah kat diri ini. Sangat banyak and tak mampu pun nak balas, hatta dengan wang ringgit sekalipun... Mampu doa agar Allah beri kesihatan yang baik and diganjari dengan syurga Firdausi atas budi baik both of them to me...


Okaylah itu sahaja ceritanya.. Minggu depan Monday to Friday, I will be in Port Dickson for PTM. Semoga makanan sedap. Haha. Nanti dah masuk kerja, makan kat hospital je, kalau ada masa laa hehs.


Sekian, #prePTMblues #preHOblues wassalam...

2 comments:

aminah azhar said...

suke bace blok akak! update lah selalu nak tahu jgk macam mane journey HO mane tahu boleh dijadikan guider bile sye jadi HO soon. doakan saye berjaye passing med school cam akak juge.
saya doakan k.ain kuat dan tabah hadapi hari ini, hari esok dan hari mendatang amin.

your secret admirer

Fatin said...

Bagusnya dapat parents yg selalu nasihat macam2 & contribute to society.. I'm touched! Sy dah xde ayah so mmg salu suka dgr nasihat ayah org lain :)